I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
I caught myself caressing my own hand while nurturing a glass of bourbon. I think it's time to get back out there.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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