Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
I'm deep cleaning my room right now. Not sure if it actually needs it or if I'm just trying to symbolically cleanse myself of the last 24 hours.
We didnt even know he was in the house until he came downstairs and asked why he was wet
So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
so, i take that as a legit invitation into his pants
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
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