Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
I think drunk me is telling hungover me something... I just have to crack the code.
I kinda knew it wasnt going to pan out when he would rather watch how i met your mother ON TIVO than fuck me......
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
Well it went from being a hug to a straight out tackle through the back door.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Would it be inappropriate to meet you at the airport after your family vacation so I can tell you all about the amazing sex I have been having?
I just told my mormon professor that I was late because I was getting a STD test... good start to the day.
I was just told I’m pretty enough to be a catfish. This made me so happy...
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