i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
She didn't talk for 45 minutes. We finally convinced her to open her mouth. There was a flower in there.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
The "don't get cum on anything" rule also applies to my furniture and scarves
That's not technology. Doesn't count.
It's total crap. On a side note I watched a porn of 4 guys wrestling in chocolate then messing around with each other. It was like a dream come true
He seems to have a lot of things figured out and most of the answers involve bourbon
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
Your whole purpose in life is to just float around and satisfy lonely women and also join lesbian couples in threesomes.
There's a woman at the bar holding a baby with one arm and doing shots of GM with the other. The baby is crying. I have lost faith in humanity.
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
