The state of Wisconsin is just irresponsible for letting me buy this many fireworks
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
He was just laying on the stairs and then screamed, "Is that a clubhouse?" I haven't seen him since
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.
Get your penis over here NOW. emergency
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
I completely forgot I gave up beer. But airports don't count. They're like international waters. No rules.
Started out playing table tennis then ended up fucking him on the table. Happy cinco de mayo
I kept screaming at his rabbit: "IT'S OKAY, YOU CAN HAVE SOME TRIX. FUCK THOSE SELFISH BITCHES."
The longer the dick, the closer to Jesus when you’re on top.
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