Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
i found her half dressed with her feet in the washer..she said it was sooo warm.
He's having sex with his gf again. Every thump of his bed against the wall is insulting to our one night stand.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
Morning yack off the fire escape. Girl walking by was mortified. Gooooooooo Ducks!!
I want to be you.
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
Ok ladies its the usual spring break system. 5 for a guy, 10 for a non-lesbian girl and double points is its a group thing. Hottest guy of the day is an additional 15. GAME ON
So because I got upset you didn't answer I threw my phone in the garbage disposal last night
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
WTF moment this morning: we were getting ready to leave and he reaches under his mattress to pull out his gun. All I could do was look at him and go "really?!"
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
Randomize
