I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
This is absurd. I need a man. Or even a moderately-clean hobo will do at this point.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
It's 5AM and I just stirred weed butter into ramen noodles. This is not where I expected to be at 30. ...But, hey, getting high off noodles.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
If I'm not there when the plane leaves, I didn't make it through security. See you at home! Vegas bitches!!!
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