oh no, I think we did it in the 'front asshole'
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
the line for where the wild things are looks like radiohead had sex with an urban outfitters
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
Omg. The news was on TV while I was giving him a bj...when the weatherman said its a beautiful start to December, he groaned and said it sure is.
he would snap chat his dick as like Harry Potter
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
Made it to the top o the stairs ALIVE YES FUCJ YOU GRAVITY
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
Randomize
