that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
I demanded respect from my fuck buddy. Drunk me is not fun.
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
It was horrifying, i havent seen a girls mouth open that wide since that one episode of Goosebumps..
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
I think you were giving a sex seminar on your kitchen table last night.
I give you full permission to seriously injure me the next time I think it's a good idea to face a bottle of vodka
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
Her mom came in and passed out drunk on the floor next to us while she was riding me, "it's all good, she does this all the time" is what she said
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Gonna do a few lines then clean my room so I can feel like my life is somewhat in order.
Randomize
