ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
God my Facebook chat is a graveyard of old blowjobz
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
To the genius that put everclear in my humidifier: your time is coming.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
What the World Series means to me is that I've slept with too many giants fans.
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
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