you know that hot chick that stutters? talk about an awkward orgasm
Took an aderol, wrote a differential equation for solving volume of flow of a rectangular channel with change in depth, then masturbated for the 6th time.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
He tricked me...the first song on his sex mix was trey songz but the rest were techno....i can't walk straight now
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
Dude, this guy showed up with a 40 and stayed for two days. I want that lack of responsibility
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
I walked outside an you were laying down talking to a star about your life. That's when I took the bottle of jack away...
I just ironed my gstring.. this is please fuck my brains out on a whole new level.
I THINK it was the lead singer. Whoever he was, I have his number and his dick was pierced.
It was totally the lead singer.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
They sent him a photo of me smoking a bong whilst wearing the dinosaur head. I think that's the last we hear of his nonsmoking fitness freak ass 🤷🏼♀️
Randomize
