I'm saving my limes so I'll know how many drinks I've had.
I do the same thing, but I use ice cubes.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
No, my body just knows its the weekend and wants to rage. Very different from alcoholism
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
Shit, my parents are coming over and I just realized that a grinder is not an acceptable paperweight
Idk who invented dominoes cheese steak pizza but I wanna lick their balls
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
I'm on my way to bail our sister out of jail with our mother's credit card. How old are we??
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