Black lace...the rest is up to ur imagination
Sandra Bullock looks like the most recent Michael Jackson
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
did i really try to jack off an athens police horse last night? please tell me youre kidding..
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
he is literally lying on the floor eating cookies. doing nothing. and as i was hitting him he needed to protect the cookies more than himself.
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
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