I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
Your TV has the DVD menu for White Chicks permanently burned into the screen. I can't anymore. That's just a whole different level that I cannot comprehend.
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
This girl did not understand, once police sirens go on, road-head needs to STOP
I hope my orgasm sounds aren't secretly that bad and no one tells me
How does this dude know what a dying walrus sounds like? That's the real question
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Randomize
