Haha na a cat just ran under your car. Howd that happen?
Probably a woman cat. Doesnt think things through
After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
We shoved chex mix between her tits for her own survival.
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
I was so ripped I had a natty light box over my head carrying a spray bottle out in the streets trying to give car washes.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
