god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
My scrabble letters just formed failure. Thanks God.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
So after tequila Thursday, Jess broke her arm table dancing. Now her and Andrew look like the perfect drunk couple, matching casts and all.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
Hah, I lost the lenses in my glasses, didn't event notice til this morning... How was the meeting?
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
No. I'm wrapped up in my sheets like a burrito. Carry me
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
Randomize
