Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
Haha o man how much you've grown. From beer bonging wine and wearing cargo shorts to well, beer bonging beer and wearing cargo shorts
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
When I said 'i love my boyfriend' I didn't mean 'send me a picture of your penis'.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
A guy in the dance floor is raising the roof with an axe in hand. I love Halloween.
My bank account got hacked so he showed up with a 6 pack wearing a superman cape to cheer me up and you question why I love him?
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
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