Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
Michelle and I recorded her bunny humping it's little rubber black ball.
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Top hats and gin. This is why I love day drinking.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
HE BEAT A GUY WITH NOTHING BUT RAZZLE DAZZLE AND HIS FABULOUSNESS
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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