She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I dk what to do with this kid he is like legitimately interested in my life.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
I think I explained what happened in the voicemail. But I think I might have just cried and ranted about how cool osiris shoes are
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
He looks like he got hit by a weed-eater with chlamydia
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
I have a callous on the palm of my hand just below my ring finger that is entirely from opening so many beer bottles. I'm strangely proud right now.
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
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