Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
i prefer some hard alcohol, but wine makes me feel less of a progressive alcoholic
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I'm still in shock that he came by my house for five minutes dropped off a Teddy bear and went to the strip club on valentines day
Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
I wish you looked at me the way you looked at my brothers penis
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
so apparantly i made out with 24 santas last night...and an elf...and a stoner
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