dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
do you think women who transgender themselves have the option of getting a circumcised or an uncircumcised dick?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
ill find time for any girl whos not afraid to grab my junk in front of 100 people
you know you go to a catholic school when you are rollin a joint with matthew 14:1-12
My mom called me and we started arguing as usual. I finally screamed at her "I HEAR YOU AND THAT 30 YEAR OLD FUCKING!" and hung up. She hasn't called back yet. I win.
No, I'm in the bathroom trying to scrub off the 16 tally marks on my wrist so its not so obviously to the world that I puked on a couch last night.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I just bought a bottle of lube for my car.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
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