Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
I've decided to turn your sobriety into a reason for me to be able to drink more.
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Hey can we break in your window? We need to borrow the dog.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
of course the one day I come to class high we have guest speakers from the police department... Just my luck
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
long story short, he tried to fuck me standing up, toppled over, and now I have four stitches next to my eye
Randomize
