So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
Don't tits with veins remind you of road maps?
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Also I'm eating leftovers with a pair of bullet removal forceps (unused) because I don't have a fork.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Definitely woke up.this morning to a random girls head in my toilet and her mom knocking on my door.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Randomize
