why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Just threw up. It looks like I may have swallowed a cigarette.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
My garbage can has nothing in it besides condoms and candy wrappers. That's good garbage.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
