It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
He's not gay. He just has bad gaydar and he gaydared himself and was wrong.
guess who just spent driver's ed figuring out how to draw a guy giving head
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
He fell off the roof... he clearly has not been preparing for summer.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Just tell your mom you have to go somewhere half naked with a strange man. She'll understand
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Reading becomes significantly more difficult when people are having crazy loud sex in an adjoining room
Dude, you spit in your shirt pocket saying "I'm saving it for later" then dove head first into the pyramid of beer cans we set up.
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