the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
We had to leave the bar because you were trying to show the bartender your boobs for water.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
Well the good news is my "i'm an adult" dinner party went well, they all brought wine and complimented my cooking abilities. the bad news is i woke up with the leftovers in my bed/on my face
On a separate but also a very relevant note, can we practice drinking wine like real people?
I must be the strongest person who ever managed to get knocked down by a pug.
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
