I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
You coming home soon, man?
HENBARSCLOSE
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
