There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
They're drinking Schnapps out of Spaghetti-o's cans. Please come pick me up.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
I tried to put the left over margartia in a box for you but they wouldn't let me
since i'm not going, you must continue my tradition of flashing every person there.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Fucking in bar bathrooms doesn't count as "rushing things"
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Hey man, when I left for work she was laying on the couch naked cuddling your keurig, can you clean that mess up?
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
Randomize
