Alright folks.. i have made history - I just hit my 2nd PARKED car SOBER withing 6 months.. :*( wtf?!
problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
I haven't seen him since I gave him a hand job in the hospital. I like to think I contributed to his speedy recovery.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
If my mom walks in on me masturbating one more time I'm moving out
You'd think the first few times would have been enough
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Should I be concerned that he called me mom when I got in bed on top of him?
Randomize
