Remember when the only STD we had to worry about were hickies? Those were the days
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I'm masturbating to football. This is why I get guys and you don't
Excused from finishing the term project because my lab partner got arrested. For the second year in a row. Public school, I love you.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
all i remember is that her bootyshorts said 'shameless' and that there was no turning back.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
she was puking red wine out the car window, telling me about how shes joining weight watchers tomorrow, not okay.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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