chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
When the cops pulled up I just stood flat against the fence with my hands up while yelling out,"I'm a tree!!"...
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
My aunt left me alone with the instructions to "get waisted" by the time she returns. I love drunk aunt.
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
I just threw up on the way to class. Legit, on the sidewalk by psych building.
THAT WAS YOU? Psych prof just pointed out the window and said "that kids, is why you don't pregame before class"
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
