I haven't shaved so I have to behave myself. I'm going to do this from now on.
good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
THERE ARE ENTIRELY TOO MANY HOT UNDERAGE GIRLS HERE FOR THIS TO REMAIN LEGAL.
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
We were walking up the stairs and I asked Dominick what floor the party was on. The cop who had just tried breaking it up was walking down the stairs, drinking a slurpee, and answered, "Third floor."
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
I tried to walk home in my heels. And I fell into a snow bank. And then I cried and a policeman came up to me and said I can't sit in a snowbank and got me a cab. So maybe that's where I left my credit card. I remember the cop asking me if I was old enough to drink, too. OMG. How embarrassing. Pretty sure I told him to "leave me alone."
That was so not worth putting pants on for.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
i knew it was a party when i saw you sitting on the couch naked with the keg in your lap, still drinking and passing out cups
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