how was the sex?
he smelled like pickles and burnt hair.
well, there's that.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
oh my god, just saw a man throw up in a trashcan and blood came out of his nose. HES GETTING ON MY BUS. HES SITTING ACROSS FROM ME. FUCK.
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
I sincerely thought making it to McDonalds by 10:00am was a shoe-in but it appears that I need to adjust my zoom when looking at the map before walking to places.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I'm not gonna plow a chick in front of her 14 year old brother....
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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