You were in my dream and you got the lyrics to lollipop tattooed on your chest. Don't get it, it wasnt that cool.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
I feel choking has become trendy-- ita losing its effect. I may just have to go back to missionary to spice it up
Wow just saw this. Nothing like a little anal sex to ring in 2012.
And now she's hand feeding me pork rines and showing me her angry birds high scores. This is Vegas.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
What eyeshadow color says "yes I am at the dentist, and yes I am hungover please don't judge my life choices"
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
Omg cinnamon bun Oreos. Thanks weed
i now know why i keep getting pictures of poop. apparently someone put my number in a girls bathroom saying i am a poop lover.
you text any of them back? this is probably the most women you'll ever have texting you in your life. don't squander a good thing
He was imitating a sprinkler when he started puking. Hence- vomit sprinkler. Some people just can't handle their tequila
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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