i have i love cock written on my hand and a vagina drawn on my arm and i just finished eating breakfast with the whole fam for mothers day
ahah at least you got away with it
nope...my gran was the one who informed me
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Just did lines off a tackle box. Love Montana.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
Babe. Honestly. Trust me. Your balls are not that big. And i'm eager.
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
She keeps comparing me to her favorite dildo and I don’t know if I’m flattered or creeped out
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
