Do you realize that we tried to rent a limo at 5am to come and take us to waffle house?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
There are many reasons why he shouldn't come over. And each one is longer than his penis.
MISSING: One left eyebrow. Reward if returned.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
Randomize