that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
first reaction to dying the pubes purple - awesome. Reaction after I explain the process - not awesome. Hypothesis? when girls find out you know to bleach and dye your hair, they're turned off.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
Randomize