No i dont need Magnum Condoms, that would be like putting MC Hammer pants on my dick
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
He showed up in a dinosaur costume bearing a tray of cupcakes. He even let me hold his tail. I'm marrying this guy.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
I'm using my ex bfs phone number to look up his Kroger card so I can get a discount on condoms...yep this is my life
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
It's been two whole weeks and I haven't missed a single class. I deserve 69 blunts.
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
I wonder if the sex shop has any Black Friday deals.
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