everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
I just had a heart to heart with a stripper I'm becoming a dentist.
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I took 20 bucks from you because when I woke up I saw more of you than I ever wanted to see bro.
Totally acceptable.
OH DEAR GOD. He looks like if u licked him he'd taste like bourbon, sex and sunshine.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Look get the dick out ur mouth and answer the phone
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