She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
Was just trying to have a normal "I fucked you without a condom" adult conversation and she flipped
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
I'm drunk and he's still weird.
You know my vagina and my heart have a mind of their own even when it’s pouring snow.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
He may have been a dick but he DID give me his Netflix log in. Maybe some good did come of it.
Randomize
