There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
I just saved him in my contacts as "Has 2 kids.. don't drunk text"
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
So what your saying is I can use her desperation to my advantage. Fuck, this must be how pretty girls feel.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
I just need some of your time and all of your body.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
He stood next to me peeing as I was puking behind a car in the parking lot, telling me how much he loved me. On the other hand, he loves me!
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