You dont remember anything at all? So you dont remember the shop down my road with the 'TO LET' sign over it? You were adamant that the 'I' had fallen off and that it used to say TOILET...so you took a shit right there in the doorway.
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
I think we got naked. I can't remember but if you have "friends" written on your ass, then we did. Because I have "best" on mine.
It's been over a year since we've been get-so-drunk-you-throw-beer-cans-at-fat-girls-drunk together. That needs to change.
Now that weed is legalized There needs to be reusable bags for people to pick up with. All this plastic is so bad for the environment and a waste
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize
