This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
I would give up sex for lent, but I think Jesus would understand that I went too long without it to go back now.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
I was just thinking about if my bath water turned to jello and got a little freaked out
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
Nice. I got home at like 3am.stopped at Walmart for a vacuum and weirdly a trash can. Not sure why high me last night needed a new trashcan.
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
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