Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
News Flash: Turtles are cuter than Jesus.
Congrats on damning at least 10 generations of your offspring to hell with just one text message. Way to start your morning off right.
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
this is probably the only time in my life that i would want to fuck thomas jefferson
Dude she's on meds. He has a ginormous penis. Ur A dumbass. That concludes our feelings chat. Dim Sumday?
He passed out with the ball in his hand so no one could play beer pong without him.
If she says "This is how acid feels" one more time I'm never trip-sitting them again.
We passed my parents while I was giving him road head...that awkward
Why don't you throw your vagina at it and see what happens?
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
It's not a walk of shame if you run
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