i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
bringing my vibrator into the shower with me. if I don't text back in 30 minutes I have electrocuted myself and died.
May the force be with you.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
I'm a bit broke right now... Would it be OK if I pay you in champagne and Xanax?
Are you good with a knife? I need someone to perform amateur surgery.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
I feel like I'm pretty optimistic for a girl that might be pregnant.
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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