I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
Every night before bed, when I used to say prayers, now I just think to myself 'freshman sluts. Soon'
The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
she's like a sexy human version of my cat. i can't catch her, and she keeps throwing up in the corners.
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I admit it could have gone better but look at it this way, since I broke the urn you don't have to worry about spreading the ashes.
Randomize
