so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
THE EAGLE HAS MY PANTIES. I REPEAT. THE FUCKING MASCOT HAS MY PANTIES.
HOLY SHIT. You're my hero.
When the sex is so good, you need three fans and have to chug a gallon of water after
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
She gave me a roadie as we drove home from fireworks. People were still lighting off their displays as we drove by. I love America.
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize
