I am in a vortex of obligation.
Is there a "Plan B" app for my iphone?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
After having to meet his mom half naked, running into the tree in front of her didn't seem so bad.
I woke up to ritz crackers on the lawn, a keystone behind the hedge and puke on the rental car... i think that we have become that house...
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
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