How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
She's making her own pesto again. Cooking spaghetti in the microwave and "frying" vegetables in the toaster oven. All this while wearing the yellow rubber gloves and saying that the pesto has feelings like a real person. Im terrified.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
the only way I will be happy is if my gallon spiderman bucket is full of either popcorn, nutella and peanut butter, or fried rice. CHOOSE WISELY.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
i have achieved a new state of being which requires no food or water but is sustained only by coffee and pure, unrelenting rage
My dad just said "fuck circus"
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
