Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
Withdrawals are gods way of saying "you're still my bitch"
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Breakfast of champions
Is that a dick crepe?
It is indeed
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
Our prom king just sent me a dick pic. I know it's 10 years later but I feel like I've finally made it.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I woke up in the bathtub with money shoved down my pants. I must've done something right.
Sorry didnt text you yesterday. had to put restraining order on my ex.
Randomize