Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
I was pretty stoned. I thought I needed a seatbelt at the restaurant.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
His friend still there? Be like "I need to see both of your dicks ASAP"
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
You humped everything and cried in an uber.
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
