Kiss
Puke
similar to the time we made up the game of screaming at the top of our lungs any time a guy any of us slept with walked into the party. that went over SO well.
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
We play beat the clock every morning. When the alarm goes off, she hits snooze and drops her panties. If I can't finish in time to beat the snooze, she jumps in the shower and I've gotta jerk off.
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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