you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Also I literally googled "how to fold socks" so that's how my day is going. How's yours?
Fuck him. He can bang that skeezer all he wants. Fuck her lawyerness I’m a YouTube star
Like sorry your dick won’t suck itself?
Randomize
